You've given birth to a big beautiful girl, but wait, she's a bit brighter and you're hoping she darkens up soon! Why does this matter? Many southern mothers still look at their daughters with jealousy and envy if they are light skinned, yes I said it! I am sure mother-daughter relationships have their own battles, but that old taboo of you looking better, lighter and brighter than me, still means a lot down south.
Makes you wonder how many broken mother-daughter relatonships or over such foolishiness. Have I seen this or been through it, lets just say yes I have on both levels. Being a woman from the deep south I can tell you that some taboos are still alive and well. When will this way of thinking stop? Lets start off by saying that a woman who is not secure with herself will find herself down this road whether she wants to be on it or not. As your relationship grows, its clear you two have issues.
Why should the color of your skin deterime the amount of love you receive?
It should not be a deciding factor in your mother-daughter relationship, but far too often it is an underling factor that many mothers are ashamed to say. They watch their beautiful daughters grow up and find themselves feeling a little envious over their beauty, instead of embracing and loving their daughters past their complexion and looks. But this is not a one-sided conversation, now is it? Dark skinned girls have a hard time loving themselves and seeing their color more than their beauty due to nasty attacks, which make them feel as if they are not their mother's equal if they are a shade darker. Growing up in such a household, its been my mission to change this way of thinking and improve mother-daughter relationships around the world, more so in the black community since we have a longer way to go in our perception versus acceptance roles.
When mothers in the african american family stop judging their existence by the color of their skin or their daughters skin, is when this sickness will pass over us as a race and the healing process of mother-daughter relationships can can start to flourish. Whatever you suffered from as a little girl with dark or light skin, it is up too you to stop the hurt and pain from passing too the next generation, be it in your family or when you look upon someone else's daughter.
Restoring your relationship with your mother or daughter may be more than just petty arguments, misunderstandings or disrespect. The sooner a mother takes control of her feelings and builds up her daughter and their relationship, the stronger they will be. This new strength can then be passed to other young women wherever she goes! The secret to healing mother-daughter relationships is getting past color and misunderstandings. This is just one way of looking at it!
Mother-daughter relationships may have a ton of problems, let's just make this one less issue!
Johanna's Personalized Prescription: For healing mother-daughter relationships wrapped in color.
To learn more about Johanna's views of mother-daughter relationship pick up your copy coming January 2016 or visit www.johannasparrow.com